Push and Pull

I don't get it. I really do not get it. I hope by the time I am done writing this.. I will get it.. but I really doubt it.

How can people WANT people in their lives and then pull them like the strings of a puppet? Is it control? Is it power? What is it?

I watch people I love and care about, myself included, be manipulated and hurt by the actions of others. And for why? Because we care about other people? What the f? No seriously... what... the f?

I want to throw my hands up in the air, scream I'M DONE!!!!! and walk away... from every person who has ever been a half-ass friend to me. For every person that has let me down. For every person that has ever disappointed me.

............but doing that, wouldn't be me.

I am THEIR friend. They are NOT mine. Something my mother told me years ago. I will always be a better friend to them, than they are to me. What upsets me, is how ANY can treat someone this way, and call themselves a friend. Maybe they don't see it.. maybe they are too selfish to care.

I am thankful that I live a life where I don't need self-validation from other people. While, yes I would love more 2-way friendships, I am perfectly content with the people in my life I know are my true friends. Everyone else... yeah.. you know who are... I'm not going to call you out. It's not my responsibility for you to be a better friend. That's your own choice.. But it is my responsibility to not allow you to hurt me.

If you can relate to this.. I suggest you do what I do.. and put THEM on notice. We are the friends who love unconditionally, are there at 2am, or at 3pm on a lazy Sunday afternoon.. we are the friends that don't give up on others, we are rare, we are strong, we are resilient.

And when you push us away... we pull you back in.

I highly suggest that you if can't deal with having someone in your life who apparently cares more about you, than you care about yourself... that you kick rocks.